Why The Media Annoys Me

Why is it that the media now has this need to shorten everything down? To remove syllables? To combine people’s names? What the hell is wrong with pronouncing Susan Boyle in its long form, why must we reduce it down to two syllables, when it was only 4 in the first place? Why are Justin and Edward now be called Jedward? Surely Justin must feel pissed off because the name is mostly his brother’s name with only his initial at the beginning?

Why can’t they be called Justward? That seems fairer, 4 letters from each of their names. Or Edin. That’s only two syllables, and has two letters from each of their name.

Or perhaps we should just continue to call them “those two annoying pricks who haven’t a brain cell between them and are being manipulated by a fat Irish man in a bid to boost a television show’s ratings who at one moment goes on about integrity and ability to sing, and then gets his puppets to perform a god-awful version of Ghostbusters whose dancing looks like it was choreographed by a blind, deaf cripple”.

Or is that too long?